In loving memory of my son, Douglas Gardner. 4/2/77 - 12/21/06
the pain grows from deep inside and I hope there is a heaven.
40 responses
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Thad Zajdowicz gave props (19 May 2008):
Very powerful -- well done.
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kristen mitchell gave props (3 Jun 2008):
r.i.p doug..........actions speak so loud.......
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Glenn Buzbee gave props (6 Jun 2008):
Very real emotion. Profound sadness is sometimes the gateway to later happiness. "Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning." (Psalms 30:5)
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peggy gardner said (6 Jun 2008):
I cannot see my son's death as a gateway to happiness or joy in the morning or ever. the weeping endures a lifetime, not one night. You would have to go through it to understand, but I wouldn't want you to have to do that. ever.
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Glenn Buzbee said (7 Jun 2008):
I understand only that you are hurting and deeply in grief. I can relate to deep grief. I cannot know your specific pain, but I can know that joy will come "in the morning" if we will allow it to come. Even if tears persist for a time, there is joy which can be ours even in the deepest times of pain.
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J. Harris Blacklist gave props (8 Jun 2008):
So much just came across me....I feel your emotion in this...it brings tears to my eyes and that heaviness to my heart.
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peggy gardner said (15 Jun 2008):
glenn thank you for your persistent kind comments. they mean a lot to me. there is great joy I have received here on jpg the last month - from people like you.
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Laura Hartley said (16 Jun 2008):
As the mother of two sons, Peggy, my heart breaks right in half for you. My brother was killed three years ago by a log from a logging truck. I loved/love him so much. I have dreams during which he visits and he tells me he is very happy and free. I wish you this same gift. 28 years was far too brief, and I ache for your loss, you beautiful photographer.
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Lindsay gave props (23 Jun 2008):
gosh, peggy, like others have already stated here...viewing this photograph, and knowing the cercumstances behind it makes my heart ache and break for you. i know these words may seem hallow and cheap, but they are all i have...i am truly sorry for your loss.
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Nora Kubach gave props (6 Aug 2008):
This photo is very moving, and I am so sorry to read about your son... may he be at peace, no matter what lies after.
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J. Harris Blacklist gave props (6 Aug 2008):
Peggy, I am truly sorry for your loss and hope you can heal.
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peggy gardner said (6 Aug 2008):
j....you're the one that's made me laugh most....thanks.
;O) -
Vidyavati Chandan gave props (6 Aug 2008):
my vote!
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John Linton gave props (7 Aug 2008):
Oh yeah! It rocks!
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William Moore gave props (7 Aug 2008):
"I'm singing in the rain, just singing in the rain"......just a few notes to brighten up your day
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Lucy Yang gave props (7 Aug 2008):
aww. such a beautiful portrait..
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Natalie S gave props (8 Aug 2008):
Incredible emotion - I am so sorry
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J. Harris Blacklist gave props (11 Aug 2008):
This image just breaks my heart.
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Gail Anderson gave props (11 Aug 2008):
heartbreaking... as a mother of three sons myself... I'm at a loss for the proper words, except to say, I'm sorry.
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Ken McElroy gave props (11 Aug 2008):
My vote. On the issue of having a child go before you - nothing I can say. Your talent though comes from all you are and all you experience. This picture and the commentary above demonstrate how sharing your grief can be of value to yourself and to others.
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Gabi Sarlay gave props (18 Aug 2008):
powerful
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Paulo Rojas (Deleted) gave props (19 Aug 2008):
I totally understand you ...lost my mom when i was 17 ...still didnt get over it
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peggy gardner said (19 Aug 2008):
thank you I wish I could rewrite it or change it...it's hard to go on....everyone has been so kind.
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petey whitelaw said (20 Aug 2008):
we've spoken about this .it makes me think of all my friends who have fallen and their families who were left to wonder why. i've seen this look before. but, i've also seen them smile, and you too, we can take comfort in that you are here and making us think through your photography and importantly, your knowledge.
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Litz Go said (20 Aug 2008):
Peg, you got my vote on this theme. You don't have to say anything. Your expression here speaks for itself. I'm
really moved. Have faith! -
gerry sexton said (28 Aug 2008):
wow peggy this is really brave of you. words are never enough but the image evokes so many emotions there are none needed. thank you for sharing.
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Charidy Bunsa gave props (29 Aug 2008):
Wonderful photo - - thank you for sharing!
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Clint Harris said (30 Aug 2008):
There is no words that hold any meaning when dealing with the loss of a loved one and there is no way explain loss.
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Jean Pierre Vacherot gave props (4 Sep 2008):
Nice, my vote
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Vicki Koch said (5 Sep 2008):
I know that pain... not a son.. but a best friend... and now my friend 4 yr old daughter - and may I say there is a Heaven... it is written down. nice hot photo - good work! Hear our words I live by... it is a song... HOW DEEP THE FATHER'S LOVE FOR US
How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure
How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory
Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished
I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast inJesus Christ
His death and resurrection
Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom -
Eric Finster gave props (6 Sep 2008):
Wow, I can only imagine your sorrow. This is a parents worst nightmare. Hope all the words from us can help relief the sorrows
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Barbara Gerstner gave props (12 Sep 2008):
Oh Peg I'm so moved...not only by your image but by the kind sentiments left for you by one of the most wonderful group of people we could ever have the honor of knowing. God bless you
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Catherine Kurvink gave props (19 Sep 2008):
A very moving portrait, Peggy. Even as a mother, I know I can't begin to relate to what it must be like. I only think I can. I do wish you some peace, but only you know when and how to find it. I do send my love. (And my vote.)
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Sudeshna Das said (23 Sep 2008):
a different angle wid excellent detailing....my vote...:)
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Mario Scattoloni said (10 Oct 2008):
I am truly speechless by the context of this image. A parents loss is never an easy thing to comprehend, especially the why us question that one feels so helpless with in this life. I sense that many of us can easily miss the point at times here, without a description that could easily have been the case. Yet, somehow it is obviously not the case here. The support & love you have been showered with here on JPG is absolutely beautiful to say the least. If this ever where my case with my own children I feel that I would crash into a dark abyss without any exit. At the moment as I write this to you I am carrying with me the weight of your heart in the pit of my stomach, this is not unlike what I felt when I loss my mother at the age of 10. My eyes are currently wells of water which has blurred my thoughts. I wish for your son & your loved ones enormous amounts of pure white light so that you may heal. Our memories & experiences unfortunately seem so abundant as photographers because of our photographic archives, that sometimes makes it the most difficult part to sift through, our past. I hope that the future provides you the creativity you need to carry on with your own life. Peace & love to you & your family.
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peggy gardner added a link (10 Oct 2008):
thank you for your deep comment. please click here. (www.jpgmag.com)
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sasha ormond said (26 Oct 2008):
there is really nothing i can say that wouldn't cheapen or minimize an experience that i cannot comprehend. i can say, from the most truthful part of my heart that healing does happen. eventually. i was told once that our pain never goes away but that we learn to deal with it as an integrated part of ourselves. this experience will never be undone, nor will the loss you have endured, but one day, i don't know when, the pain will take on a different form and feel differently in your body, in your bones. again, i can't even begin to understand your pain. but i know pain, loneliness, the deep deep dark hole, the never ending waiting, the feeling that we are completely alone and that nobody could possibly understand the depths of it all. in this, you are not alone. in this you are human, sad and frail at times like the rest of us. my sympathies and good thoughts go out to you peggy.
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Kaan Unugur gave props (18 Jan 2009):
...
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Lindsay said (6 Apr 2009):
love you peggy.
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dp * said (17 Jun 2009):
I saw this as one of three pix's at the bottom...My heart goes out to you. I can not come even close to know this.....
Peace to you. dp
