A Country for Girls :::::: (First of Three)
She wants money. I tell her I am taking pictures of the pretty building. She says nothing, and watches me take pictures.
But then I feel my pockets to see if I actually have coins. I’ve only been in town for a day, and coins have been few. No small bills, either, I think, but the way she is looking at me, pregnant with hope, is an eclipse of my intentions. A poor moon, minerals and dust, she clouds my view. I focus more sharply on my surroundings. What am I seeing?
A girl, in the slum, posing for cash: a picture of hope before it is extinguished. Here is childhood in front of me, not poverty. But I am no child, so I want to hide my intrusion with money. The coins are in my shirt pocket, hidden in the folds of my Floyd pants, in the ashtray, in the pockets of the publisher’s rep who has flown down here with me to see if I will really do as I say: “I’ve got some coins,” says the rep, “Funny, they weren’t there a moment ago.” He rains coins. They fall into my lap. My car tinkles change, Cordobas cascade from the domelight.
Let me take your picture. I will give you some gringo coins, too.
I take this picture, and two others that will be a threesome called “A Country for Girls,” and when I am finished the coins fill her cupped hands. Where have they all come from? I ask her name and where she lives and how old she is, as I cast for nickel and copper.
But more children are coming. I start to drive away. I am late, the Rep is itching, and destiny whirls me across the country, toward a shocking morality play at the end of eight days that destroys a man, with me as either Lear or Shakespeare, author or killer, not sure which. This trade of coin for picture is the second step on my path, the first being the intuition that something important waits for me here, some passage not available on my own street, neither in my mind nor in the comforts of a home which never quite fits.
And in my mirror, looking backward, in hindsight and safety, before I turn off her street into diesel and schedule, I see Evangelina assaulted by other urchins, by the boy she said was her brother, by the older girl she said was her sister, and in two seconds the coins are a glittery shower in the sunlight and a dozen children shriek in delight or dismay as the coins stick or slip away, and Evangelina is suddenly empty-handed, as I found her, a non-renewable resource stripped.
Maybe I pressed my brakes, said something to the publisher, but I drove away. She was unhurt. Back to her original contours, swollen with hope. But I drove away, resolute that my next step will be an effort to give back, to make amends.
(Like any tourist with a camera I cruise after prey, unaware that I have already swallowed the line, unaware of the hook already pierced into my heart.)
In the story My Secret Nicaragua.
38 responses
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j dixon gave props (10 Apr 2008):
what a story. Nice to see a pic from you!
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Frederic Frognier gave props (10 Apr 2008):
Man, those eyes...
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Rachel Mckinnie gave props (10 Apr 2008):
Such raw emotion...powerful story, powerful portrait Mr. Blue.
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Gary Fudge gave props (10 Apr 2008):
Great story and shot Seanie. What's really sad is the fact around the world this is such a familiar story. What's really sad is that so many of these children are put out on the street for this one reason, to beg and make money for the family. I saw this so many times in particular around areas like Macedonia, Albania, some of the bigger cities in Pakistan and I'm sure just so many other places. A beautiful but sad little face like this will get more money then her older brothers and sisters, who move on to crime and other things to make money. Strange that we humans are supposed to be the civilized race!
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Sanjin Lopatic said (10 Apr 2008):
Powerful story and beautiful picture.
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Chris Whitney said (10 Apr 2008):
Great story Seanie-as with many of your images/stories, your single shot and story combine to create a thought provoking visual impression greater than the story or image alone.
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Hector Ortiz gave props (10 Apr 2008):
omg,, you just make me cry.... thanks for those beautiful words... i'm waiting for the rest of the pictures...
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Pilar Coll i Gatells said (10 Apr 2008):
Història, bona!
Foto, també. La mirada lo millor. -
Mojca Savicki gave props (10 Apr 2008):
Too many sad stories like this one around the world. After I once gave the money to a gipsy boy who begged for it saying it would be for some bread and then I saw his mother who took the money and went to buy cigarettes I don't give them money anymore, I just buy them something to eat or some sweets. Some woudn't take anything but money cause money is what they have to bring home. Nice to see you back Seanie :)
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Audrey Kanekoa-Madrid gave props (10 Apr 2008):
powerful....
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adniloj gave props (10 Apr 2008):
wonderful pic; quite a moving narrative, thank you!
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Laura Boston-Thek gave props (11 Apr 2008):
What power and connection this little spirit projects through the lens...what she has experienced in her short life. I feel selfish in saying I am so very happy to have these amazing words and images back once again...with my morning cup it is an inspiring way to begin one's day. Thank you Mr. Blue for sharing you plentiful gifts with all of us here.
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Kiwi ana gave props (11 Apr 2008):
Nice to see work from you Seanie, Sounds like a journey of the soul you have been on. This is a landmark photograph. All you speak of sits in her eyes. I love your words as well they pull me in.
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May gave props (11 Apr 2008):
wow.
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Portia Söderberg gave props (11 Apr 2008):
Seannie, such a powerful essay to go along with a powerful image.
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Photography Seven said (11 Apr 2008):
a winner
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Noa Siegrist said (11 Apr 2008):
Thank you for your story.
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Ronnie Ginnever said (12 Apr 2008):
Wow Seanie, this is a powerful truth. The photo of the little girl sends a chill thru my body. Last night on PBS Bill Moyers had a segment of his show on hunger in America. The lack of food in America for those who are most needy is on the rise. 35 million people, mostly children, don't have enough to eat.
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Nelson Campbell gave props (12 Apr 2008):
A look we do not think should come out of one so chronologically young.
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Anne Mcginn gave props (12 Apr 2008):
Beautiful story and shot. Her eyes hurt me - because of the truth they convey. Excellent work, Seanie.
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Konrad Ragnarsson gave props (13 Apr 2008):
Good story,if you look in her eyes you se her story,very good image!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Allen Price said (13 Apr 2008):
I'm just glad you're back.
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Lyndsay Smith gave props (13 Apr 2008):
Wow, such a powerful and moving capture. The story that goes with this photo makes it that much more moving. Great job. Voted yes!
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Steve Hogle gave props (14 Apr 2008):
Fantastic Writing and capture Seanie, Nice to see you posting and writing here again.. Welcome back!
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judy fouse gave props (16 Apr 2008):
Yes, you stretch our imaginations, our hearts and our souls. Welcome Back.
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maria tizon gave props (16 Apr 2008):
Oh Seanie. Imagine my surprise to see a new photo from you up. I love both your image and your words. Wonderful work. P.S. I was so bummed I didn't get to meet you last Sunday.
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Gary Fudge gave props (16 Apr 2008):
As my last props would appear to have been deleted without comment to either you or I Seanie, I shall take the opportunity to repeat myself, with your leave sir.....The sadness here is almost palpable. Your noble gesture to this pretty little girl feeds an industry of begging, which in turn go towards feeding her family. Her pretty face will collect more money than that of her older siblings and certainly of her parents. I have seen this so often, especially Albania, Macedonia, Greece and in Pakistan. She represents so many children forced into begging, before possibly heading into crime. A tragedy which we mostly choose to ignore. As humans, we're supposed to be the superior race. What other animal does this to their off spring?
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Elizabeth Petushkov gave props (18 Apr 2008):
awesome shot, awesome writing
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Ursula Tillmann gave props (23 Apr 2008):
Great facial expressions.
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Melissa Olsen said (25 Apr 2008):
Beautiful and moving Seanie.
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Michael Stafford said (28 Apr 2008):
beautiful Mr. Blue
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Natalie S gave props (6 May 2008):
Your writing is incredible - brings me to the place you describe. Evangelina's photo, and this descriptive day in her everyday life leave me emotionally humble.
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Charlane G gave props (12 May 2008):
this made me cry because for everyone of one of "her" there are hundreds, thousands more
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paul moore gave props (27 May 2008):
behind the eyes of the most beautiful model often lies an ugly tale.beautifuly captured.
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Lynn H gave props (26 Nov 2008):
Gorgeous child! Love your work!
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John Linton gave props (1 Dec 2008):
I'm always fascinated by the first photo JPGers have on their site.
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Ognjen Karabegović gave props (17 Jan 2009):
Exelent shot.
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Andrew Lorimer gave props (18 Apr 2009):
powerful story powerful capture !!
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